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A life spent waiting is a life completely wasted

Posted on September 08 2014

I have a weird thing with songs. I can remember the first time I heard every song I have on my laptop / ipod / iphone etc. When I hear a familiar song, memories flood in, scents overwhelm me, details of what I was thinking, how I was feeling and who I was at that time take a hold of me. It’s the strangest thing.

This morning, on my way back from the gym, a Toni Braxton song came up and like clockwork, everything that I felt in January of 2007 came pouring back. I remembered a broken relationship, hours, days and months spent thinking about that relationship. In fact, every waking moment was spent wishing and waiting for things to be better. It was then that I realized that if I tracked my life moments and was completely honest with myself, most of my time has been spent wishing, waiting, thinking and hoping.

It’s not that I’m not a doer. I’ve accomplished a lot and I’m incredibly proud of my achievements but the fact is, I have also wasted a lot of moments on pointless and energy sucking situations. The moments spent waiting on someone to get their act together, waiting for someone to love you, waiting for that big dream to come true…these are all moments that we can never get back. Don’t get me wrong, waiting can teach patience, gratitude, appreciation, strength and so much about life. But that’s not the kind of waiting that I’m talking about. I’m talking about a self-inflicted, physical, mental and emotional paralysis.  

We often say that life is short but even if life was long, shouldn’t we make every moment count? Shouldn’t we consciously choose how we spend our time as well as who and what we think of? Shouldn’t we stop waiting and start being? Whenever I get together with any of my single girlfriends, the conversation usually turns to love. We spend so much time talking about, thinking about and strategizing about love. We fail to stop and enjoy the beautiful moments that we’re actually sharing together and that are in fact, very much filled with love. We forget that sooner or later, that love we so desperately seek will come and there’ll be a whole new set of challenges to conquer.

As much as I love pondering life’s interesting questions, I love finding a solution more and there’s no other solution to this than being present. If you’re single for example, enjoy the freedom that comes with being able to come and go as you please and making decisions without having to consult someone else. Spend time with friends and let them contribute to your life.

They say it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, I say it is better to live and experience every moment, both exciting and mundane than to wait for special moments that may never come.

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