How To Embrace Change
Posted on October 05 2015
I love Autumn. I love the period of transition because it forces me to stop and acknowledge change. I love that it helps me see beauty in the things that I take for granted. I love that I feel romantic, melancholic and happy all at the same time. I love the changing and falling leaves; the gray and cloudy skies. I love the beautiful music, poems, books and creative energy that always seem to find me during this season. I love that there always seems to be a little spice in the air. I woke up this morning to that change happening again and butterflies in my stomach.
I didn’t always embrace change so willingly. I’ve fought it, argued with it, negotiated with it and tried to plead my way out of it. I learned quickly that the only way out is acceptance. Change is scary, whether it’s moving into a new job or higher position, having your first child or leaving a relationship. There are also the kinds of changes that we choose and those that choose us. Either way, the path to freedom is the same –you must embrace change with all that you are.
“…if a hare has seven skins, a man may skin himself seventy times seven times without being able to say, ‘Now that is truly you; that is no longer your outside.’” Friedrich Nietzsche
Change, like most of life’s challenges is meant to skin you, to build you and forge you; to make way for the best of you. I remember moving to the U.S when I was thirteen. Despite leaving my home and friends, I was incredibly excited for a new experience. I had grown up listening to my parents’ stories about traveling the world and this was my chance to build my story. What I didn’t anticipate was that a bunch of ignorant kids would drive me into becoming a shell of myself. About two years into my journey, I realized that the girl who went after what she wanted with confidence and vigor had become quiet and fearful of everything.
All I did was look. I stopped participating and became a fulltime observer of life. It would take another few years before I found my voice again. After growing out of that stage, I would often get angry with myself for letting people get to me the way they that did. These days, I see that period of my adolescence as life-changing. Most of the insight that I have about why people are the way they are and most importantly why I am the way that I am, came to me during those quiet years. I wouldn’t change those experiences if I could.
“What you resist persists.” Carl Jung
It’s normal to want to push back at what you don’t fully understand. When you don’t know what’s waiting for you on the other side, fear takes over. and start building all kinds of stories in the mind about the future. 99% of the time, those stories will not come to fruition. If by any chance they do, I’ve learned that it is not the end of the world. You adapt and you figure it out.
There’s only one way that I know how to embrace change. It is with open arms, with grace, with acceptance and most importantly with the knowing that what ever circumstance or life situation I’m facing is eventually bound to change.